Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Little by little

Besides what I posted a few weeks ago about feeling crabby, I haven't been posting how I've really been feeling. The truth is, for a little while there, things weren't good at all. Not only was I exhausted and nauseous all the time (which in and of itself makes life hard), I think I was also dealing with with some mild, short-term depression. If the fatigue and nausea wasn't enough to lay me out, the depression was. I had hard time doing any of my normal activities and I felt like the kids were really the ones paying the price, so most of the time, I drug myself along to keep things normal for them, even when I would have have rathered just stay in bed, never stepping foot outside my door. Looking back, I'm glad I did, because I think just laying on the couch or in bed all the time would have made me feel worse for longer.

But now, the clouds are starting break a little bit and I'm starting to feel like my normal self. I'm still nauseous most of the time and dealing with all-day sickness. But the fatigue and "blues" have started to fade, so I'm able to actually function, even between dates with my toilet. Normally, this level of nausea would be enough to keep me whining, but now I have a little perspective.

It feels fantastic to feel half-way normal again.


Mommy Daisy said...

Wow, that does take a lot to admit. But there is nothing wrong with that. I'm glad that you seem to be doing better. And I hope that you continue along that path. It is hard when you're in that first trimester, and I can't imagine how much harder with 3 other children to care for. Keep your chin up.

Jana said...

I'm so glad you're feeling better. It is so hard to take care of other people, especially kids, when those bouts of depression hit. I hope the clouds continue to clear and your nausea subsides soon because that is no fun, either.

KatieBug said...

Poor Honey. I'm glad things are getting better. I need to get that bag of clothes to you soon, huh?

Don't be too hard on your self the kids are going to be just fine! When I was pregnant with Peanut some days it was all I could do to get everyone a bowl of cereal. We took 17 weeks of school so I could lay around and barf. But now thing are much better and they will be for you too!